How to Kill 11 Jerks in 11 Hours
Quotes Writing a List Jessie: I can't fucking believe 11 assholes who I thought were my friends outranked me on Total Drama Supernova! I'm going to write a list of those 11 pricks and kill them all in 11 hours or less! Yuki: Oh Jess, is this necessary? Jessie: Yep, I deserved to be in the Finale. Yuki: Come on, there's always next season. I've never seen you so overreactive ever since the 2013 AFL Grand Final when the Dockers lost. Jessie: Here's some advice, never fuck anybody in purple. First on my list is Mom. Victim 1 - Jessie Snr Jessie Snr: (hums happily) Jessie: Hi mom. Jessie Snr: Oh hey sweetie, you shouldn't be running with samurai swords in the house. Jessie: You backstabbing bitch! How could you vote off your own daughter on TD Supernova!? Jessie Snr: You mean the one I got eliminated in with the Hugh Jackman guy? Jessie: Yes, Daniel Dane. So anyways, DIE BITCH!! Jessie Snr: Please sweetie, don't do this! (Jessie slices Jessie Snr in pieces with the sword) Jessie: Well, one asshole down, ten to go. The next person on my list is... Victim 2 - Daniel Intern: ... Daniel Dane, you're on in 15 minutes. Daniel: Ok, just let me get spray tanned and I'll be good to go. Jessie: Heh heh, what Daniel doesn't know that I replaced his tanning oil with hydrochloric acid. Daniel: Okay intern, spray me. (the spray tan machine sprays hydrochloric acid on Daniel) Daniel: (screams) This isn't tanning spray! Who the fuck replaced my oil!? Oh god, my skin's all shit! (Daniel collapses) Victim 3 - Macey Jessie: Teach you to cut my hair, ruin my reputation and popularity on TD Supernova. Macey: Hey loser, get the fuck off my property before I call the cops. Jessie: Oh come on, just because I got kicked off TD Supernova unfairly, that doesn't mean I'm a loser. Macey: Well I won immunity twice and you managed to win none. Bye. Jessie: Bye indeed. 5 minutes later... Macey: What the... why are my brakes cut!? Driver: Hey watch out! (Macey screams as her car crashes) Jessie: Down goes the super bitch. Eight more assholes to kill. Victim 4 - Leighton Victim 5 - Caitlin Caitlin: Time to have a nice soothing bath after a day of pain and shit. Jessie: Hey Caitlin. Caitlin: Uh hi Jess, this isn't the best time for you to be in here. Jessie: Oh yes it is. You fucking voted me off on TD Supernova and you're gonna fucking die! (grabs the British flag that was hanging from the wall and chokes Caitlin with it) Caitlin: (gagging) Jess, what are you doing to me? Victims 6 and 7 - Fantasia and Danton Victim 8 - Tyson Victims 9 and 10 - Diego and Kandi Victim 11 - Ciara Trivia * The causes of death for each of Jessie's 11 victims were: ** Jessie Snr - Sliced in pieces with a samurai sword ** Daniel - Dies due to hydrochloric acid in his tanning spray ** Macey - Killed in a car crash due to a cut brake ** Leighton - attacked by a lion ** Caitlin - Choked to death by a rolled-up British flag ** Fantasia and Danton - slaughtered by chainsaw ** Tyson - tied to a cinderblock and is thrown off the Golden Gate Bridge ** Diego and Kandi - run over by a car ** Ciara - was bashed to death by a chair Category:Season 11 Category:Episodes Category:Non-Canon